Whew! This only took me almost three years to compile. I first decided to do this March 2016, and that was before I even started my grading scale on how to assess a movie. Back then, I started going through watching all the Best Picture winners mostly by personal instinct, but knew I had to go through again with the ones I already watched and put them through my grading scale. Even then, my grading scale had a lot of massive alterations made over time, which meant some movies I graded I had to regrade so that I could get a more accurate score of the film's objective quality. That's why this took so long to complete. But here it is, finally! Yay!
Just a forewarning: lots of unpopular opinions and hot takes ahead, and there's ninety movies that won the prize, so prepare for lots of scrolling.
I don't think I would be where I am today if it wasn't for Pixar. Right from my preschool days, Toy Story was there to entertain me. I had my own Buzz Lightyear figure which sadly got horribly destroyed over the years, and for Christmas at age eight I got my own Woody, who lost his hat while staying at a hotel in Disneyland. I also watched A Bug's Life probably ever other day when I was in Kindergarten, and when my family got the DVD for Monsters, Inc., I again watched it basically every other day. Since this was the era when DVD were brand new, I was so intrigued by the special features that told about the making of the monster world. This fascination carried on for the rest of my youth, from Finding Nemo to Up, I religiously awaited each one, seeing what other lifeless objects Pixar could bring to life. So like everybody else, I was swelled up in tears when I saw what looked like my childhood ending with Toy Story 3. But the real ending of my childhood was Cars 2, the first film by the studio to get a rotten score on RottenTomatoes. I just couldn't believe it! My favorite studio actually made a bad movie?
Since I came to that realization that Pixar was no longer the greatest animation studio in the world, my critic's mindset was initiated. Now, here is what I believe is the ultimate ranking of all Pixar's work.
Look at IMDb's Top 250. You may notice that out of everything that British director Christopher Nolan has directed for the silver screen, only two of his nine feature-length films failed to make it in here. In the top 100, six of those seven features made it in there. In the top 50, five of those six features made it in there. In the top 25, two of those five features made it in there. In the top 5, one of this features made the number four spot.
Does this imaginative director deserve that much praise? In my opinion, absolutely not. If you ask me, he is the most overrated director working in Hollywood today, and perhaps the most overrated director of all time. But nobody can deny his influence on the fusion between art house and blockbuster entertainment. In a time when those two approaches to filmmaking are never even showcased in the same theater, Nolan knew how to find common ground. Therefore, I would like to tribute his work in honor of his newest WWII thriller Dunkirk, by ranking every one of his nine feature-length productions.
So without further ado, let the list commence!
Throughout this last decade, Marvel Studios has taken over the box office with massive hit after massive hit. Even after some close calls, they never fell to complete abysmal failure that permanently hurt their reputation. They even had plenty of imitators that never succeeded to get cinematic universes off the ground (I’m looking at you, DC).
So I, a film critic, should tell you guys something, watching everything in the MCU simply made me depressed, noticing mostly their repetitious predictability, accompanied by hardly subliminal racism. I mean, I can certainly respect what they get right, that is, the ability to keep fans of the franchise pleased over the years. I acknowledge that these movies are not intended to be Citizen Kane, just a mode of escape from daily life. But I am going to critique these films as art, which means I am going to say things about the Marvel Cinematic Universe that you’re probably going to hate reading. Thus, I have lots of unpopular opinions that are focused more on storytelling quality than entertainment.
So, let the list commence!
If you are among the billions of fans of this franchise, then I'm almost 100% certain you have your own ranking in mind for the world's most famous franchise. Well, good news, so do I! But my ordering is a little (a lot) different from what you had in mind. I had more of a meticulous process to go through the judgment toward each of the seven films in the series, which you can learn about in detail at this link. I too have loved the Star Wars franchise over many years, and watching one of these legendary films is an experience yet to be matched by any other generation. I would love for the legacy established by George Lucas to live on for generations to come, which is what my intent in my ranking of the films is for. So this is what I believe, from four years of education towards a film degree (Cum Laude, 2015), is an objective ranking of the films that came to define the heart of America's pop culture:
Whether you love him or hate him, Tim Burton has maintained the reputation of defining an entire reputation with his dark imagination. His films may not be the best ever made, but they are certainly iconic. If you just pulled out a single freeze-frame from one of his movies, you'd immediately know whether it was from Beetlejuice or Mars Attacks or Edward Scissorhands. Yet the thing with Burton is, with all his movies that pick up media attention, he has made several others that miss the public radar, which in particular I would bring attention to in this ranking.
So now, in commemoration of his newest feature film Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, here is what I believe is the definite ranking of all his motion pictures.
But first, click here to see the format I used to make my criteria for judging each film!
He has been one of the most influential and most famous filmmakers in all of history. Multiple generations of viewers have been inspired by his imagination with the screen, and his legacy still stands today with the standing popularity of films such as Jaws, Raiders of the Lost Ark, E.T., Jurassic Park, Schindler's List, and Saving Private Ryan. Amazingly, he's still at work to this day in creating inspiring feature after inspiring feature. I also love how varied his style is: he's been over the ocean, far into the future, well into the dark periods of the past, introduced us to other worlds, and even brought dinosaurs back to life. They are all seemingly different types of films yet they share one characteristic in common: captivation of what's on the screen. I say this is an artist who deserves to have all his work, both good and bad, memorialized.
So now, to celebrate the premiere of The BFG, Spielberg's 29th feature film, here is my picks for each of his other works ranked from worst to best:
Last June, my sister showed me an article on Buzzfeed about their picks for the definite ranking of Disney's animated features, from worst to best. I respectfully disagreed with the list, and from that point dedicated myself to forming what I believe is a more accurate list. So over the course of eight months, I took the time to watch all fifty-four of the animated pictures Disney created over their near eight-decade run. In that time, I judged each film based on ten criteria: story, characters, family appeal, representation of Walt's theme "dreams come true," representation of magic that helped see those dreams come true, technological achievement (or as Walt calls it, "imagineering"), animation, art direction, music, and historical representation. Now, here is what I believe is the definite objective ranking of the Disney films, setting aside nostalgia:
I am an author who loves to talk about movies. I enjoy Seattle, cats, cookie dough ice cream, and photography. Subscribe to my site for autism lessons in your favorite movies!
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